I never thought that I would become a model or an influencer. I was a wallflower in middle school and high school; I didn't feel ugly, but I also didn't feel that I was the cutest. That's why I thought that modeling was not a possibility for me, but I have always wanted to be in the beauty industry.
I began studying at the University of Arizona in 2016 and it was then that things began to change for me. I was a late bloomer, so my looks began to evolve during my freshman year of college.
When I was 19 years old, Instagram was booming and there were many "college babe" accounts on social media. These were accounts that reposted pictures of good-looking girls who went to the University of Arizona.
One day, in 2018, I posted a photo of myself to my Instagram account and a college account took my picture and reposted it without my permission. My followers grew by ten thousand that night. I was shocked because of how quickly my Instagram following became large. After that, every time an account reposted a picture of me, my following grew tremendously.
A few months after my pictures went viral on social media, a modeling agency in Arizona reached out to me and asked if I could model for a bikini calendar that they were publishing. It felt great to be recognized as a beautiful woman; it was encouraging and made my self-confidence skyrocket. I not only felt beautiful within myself, but I also felt loved online, which was great.
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At the shoot, I felt very comfortable in front of a camera. I was also lucky because the people that I was on set with became my friends. I worked for that agency for a long time because of how close I had gotten with them, and it was an amazing experience.
During that time, I was getting paid for several modeling jobs and I knew that being a social media influencer and a model would be a good career for me. It was surreal to know that in the span of five months, my career had evolved drastically.
Moving to Los Angeles
In 2019, I decided to move to Los Angeles to progress in my career. In L.A., I took every opportunity I could. I felt like I was a "yes" person because I agreed to any collaboration I was offered, whether it was a feature on a podcast or a modeling job.
In 2022, I became very big on social media and in the modeling industry to the point where I was finally able to take a step back and choose what I wanted to do, instead of saying yes to everything. I felt a little bit more in control.
Because I'm from a very small town in Arizona, moving to L.A. was different for me, but I grew to love it. At first, I was slightly nervous, but I knew that I was making the right decision for myself and my career. I was very passionate about the fact that I was in the right place, and that I was doing all the right things to progress.
But it was there when I encountered my first stalker.
My first stalker experience
In 2019, after moving into my first apartment, I saw a comment on social media that linked me to an account where a person, who I believe must have been a neighbor, was taking videos of me on my balcony, and posting them, without my consent. He had posted a video of me online and many people were commenting, "Is that Hannah Palmer?"
I felt very uncomfortable, extremely violated and shocked. The worst part for me was when I realized that many other girls in my apartment complex were being recorded by the same person, as other videos were surfacing of them online.
They had no idea that they were being recorded, so I immediately reported it to the property manager. I then told the other girls in the apartment complex that they were being recorded and warned them to close their blinds. When I called the police, they said that it was a cyber matter, so I had to file a report with the FBI.
I had never seen the guy, as he hid in his apartment and his window shades were always closed. His account also had a lot of videos of him recording women sunbathing at random hotels or walking up an escalator whilst they were wearing dresses. It was very scary.
It was reassuring to know that I was moving out of that apartment and into a new one, so I didn't have to worry about that stalker for much longer. But still, I felt that it was my priority to make sure that all of the other girls knew that they were being recorded.
My second stalker experience
In 2022, I purchased a home in Arizona. I now split my time between living there, and in L.A.
When I was in the process of buying a home, I did everything I could to hide my address online and even hired a cybersecurity consultant. Naturally, the first stalking experience had shaken me, and I wanted to make sure that I was safe. I also made sure that I bought a house with hardly any other houses surrounding it; there was only one other house within my vicinity.
Then someone began recording the outside of my house and sending me photos of the inside of my bedroom. I was shocked and scared. This person then began sending me very abusive and aggressive text messages, threatening to harm me. They then began to continuously text harming messages to me for weeks. I was scared to block this person in case they showed up at my doorstep. It was the most violating experience I had ever been through.
I did not respond to any of the text messages. Instead, I called the police as soon as I began receiving them. I have incredible security at my house, so, I feel very safe.
However, when I was in the process of filing a police report and getting a restraining order, I was very scared. This person was not identifiable online so I didn't know what they looked like, but I was informed by the police that it was a man. I would be at the grocery store and not know if he was around me.
Filing a police report was a very scary process. I wanted it to happen overnight so that I could be reassured. During the two months that I was waiting for the restraining order to be filed and granted, I never once slept alone, thanks to my friends and family who stayed with me.
I told my loved ones what was happening, which made me feel better because they comforted me; it made me feel safe to know that they were there protecting me.
Two months later, the restraining order was granted and I haven't gotten any messages since.
I'm very grateful to be a model and influencer and I'm thankful for my career despite what I have been through, I still count my blessings every day.
I think that anyone going through a similar situation should be vocal about it because people need to know that stalking is a common experience that many women and men experience.
It's good to know that we have resources to help us, and people who are willing to listen. I would have never known, had I not taken the steps to seek help. Towards the beginning, I wasn't even sure if I had enough evidence to file a police report against the person who was harassing me, but I'm thankful that I tried, and that I was heard.
Hannah Palmer is a social media influencer and model. You can find out more about her here.
All views expressed in this article are the author's own.
As told to Newsweek associate editor, Carine Harb.
